How very chivalrous

.

My dear brother in law, Menashe (I'm sure you remember him from posts like this and this, at the very least), recently found a funny packaging detail in his branch of the Shufersal grocery chain. Since I go to that same chain, but in a different location, I looked for it the next time I went. Lo and behold, it was right there, waiting for me, and so I took out my trusty camera.

 

Looks innocent enough, right? Little did you know that this is the most considerate, chivalrous mouse around. Let's flip it over to see what it says on the back:

 

So first of all, it's very informative. I never knew that the ultimate movement speed of normal man is 25 inches. Did you? That really explains a lot.

But did you see the best part? This one's suitable for the ladies! Finally.

And so, all of you ladies out there who think you don't have a sweet enough deal, maybe this here mouse will change your perspective. It's just for you! Who could ask for anything more :)

Have a great day, everyone!

A double whammy

.
Some of my fans are upset. There's a tremendously funny sign that's been spotted in Jerusalem's Mamilla Mall, and I didn't catch it first. That's okay, everyone! There are thankfully enough goofy signs out there that I don't mind sharing the limelight. However, since Zev (who took this photo in the first place) said he didn't mind if I posted it too, here you go:

 

Impressive and embarrassing, all at once! This sign is trying (in Hebrew, at least) to point out a passageway for disabled folk. The trouble here is that Hebrew doesn't have vowels, and so ma'avar (passageway) and me'ever (beyond) are spelled the same way. That's not generally a problem, since any human can figure out the correct context that the word is supposed to match. But it seems that Google Translate has gotten us once again - when I plugged these Hebrew words in, 'beyond disabled' is exactly what popped up as the English translation! Not so shocking, really; we've seen the blunders of Google Translate before. I think what is shocking is that whoever wrote this sign didn't think to double check with anyone before they rushed to print it up!

Anyway, that sign is fantastic, but it's not technically mine. So I figure this is as good a time as any to share with you all a different sign that I found at that same Mamilla mall, a couple of months ago:

 

Ha! My kids generally prefer pickles in vinegar to those in dill, but if they're really that big, I suppose they might reconsider...

Have a great day, everyone!

Okay, you tell me

I see this one almost every week, and almost every week it makes me chuckle out loud. Why? I'm not sure I can even put it into words. Maybe the imagery behind personal sponges just doesn't mingle well in my head with food?

Yeah. Yeah, that's probably it :) 

A simply splendid post

There's an older guy at my office who keeps things. I don't know how else to describe it - if there's anything you need, just ask him, and it's likely that he has it. He likes collecting old broken stuff, fixing it up, and giving it out to his friends. Furthermore, he's pretty handy at building new things out of what others would label junk. I'm pleased to list myself among his friends, and over the years, he's helped me out, and I've happily provided him with lots of broken stuff in return :)

A couple of months ago, he came to my desk, and offered me a wristwatch. I recalled my oldest daughter asking for a new one, and so I figured I'd bring it home and see if she was interested. She really liked it, since it had one of those stretchy bands, and since it fit, she slipped it right on. That's why I didn't get a close look at it until later. Imagine my surprise:

Unbelievable, right? I just don't get tired of this stuff.

By the way, I have to recommend this post that I saw today at Lovely Listings. If you haven't seen this blog before, go now! Sara is always, always laugh-out-loud funny - you won't regret going back and checking her daily!

Have a great weekend, everyone!

Officers only?

Our friends Lonnie and Jeff were in Ein Chemed recently, and found this wonderful, wonderful specimen. Just look at it!

For those of you who can't read Hebrew, and are perhaps a bit confused: this sign is trying to direct us to the washroom/bathroom/powder room/facilities/whatever you choose to call that important place that everyone's always embarrassed to talk about. So, now do you get it? Ha! See, had they gone for the "officers only" version instead of "water closet," they would have had a much easier time, it seems. But I've never seen anyone make this mistake before. Wow!

Thanks for thinking of me, guys - this is great!

Happy Anniversary!

My brothers and I were actually pretty efficient in getting an anniversary gift for my parents, a few weeks ago. For once, we managed to coordinate and choose something together, despite our living in four different cities, on two different continents. Wow, just typing that really puts life in perspective... Anyway, a few days after their anniversary, my father emailed me a photo of the box that our gift had arrived in; he thought I would enjoy it. Just so you understand, we got them a funky chala cutting board that sneakily opens into a bread basket. Of course, it's an Israeli product, and so you never know where the spelling will take you:

As I said to my Dad, this seems to be a gift that keeps on giving. But still, it was pretty embarrassing. My thought was: let's check the website where we originally found it, and see if they messed it up there, too. Lo and behold, they did, but differently...

Oh, those Israelis. I mean, us Israelis! We lead the world in medicine, technology, patents, publishing, you name it. But why can't we spell in English? Or at least misspell consistently? Oh, now I remember - to move up in the entertainment sector :)


Thanks, Mom and Dad - and Happy Anniversary!

Going rouge

This is one of the absolute best translation mistakes that I've seen in a long time. This isn't an accidental typo that was overlooked, but an actual mistake, a product of research and effort. Thanks so much, Gidon, for finding it! Here we go:

So, for those of you who can't read Hebrew, this is a jar of Sumac. You, know, it's a spice, it's sitting right there, on the spice rack. Sumac in Hebrew is called, you guessed it, Sumac. But apparently the guys who translated this jar from Hebrew weren't convinced that Sumac was also its name in English, so they went to look it up. Way to go, guys!

The trouble is that SMC is also the Hebrew root for blushing. So when you look it up (for example, here) you end up finding this:

 

They were so very very close. So close! And yet, not nearly close enough. Well, I suppose we should be relived that they opted for the first word on the top line of our definition, and not the second :)

Thanks, Gidon!